Emerald Catron
Emerald Catron has written for Asylum, Lemondrop, MyDaily and Daily Fill. She is one half of rap duo Dem Shortybooz and is a comedic performer around NYC. Follow her on Twitter @emeraldcatron
It's that time again. Thanksgiving -- you eat until you're sick, post endless "artsy" photos of your sweet potato gratin on Facebook and drink as much as you can so you can deal with your Uncle Rick. Before descending into pure turkey madness, purvey these memes, and perhaps the memory of them will get you through the annual lecture on what "those politicians up on Capitol Hill" are really "up to."
Then: Katrina Johnson was an original cast member of 'All That' on Nickelodeon. She was on the show for the first two and half of the third seasons of the show. While a cast member, she did impressions of Roseanne Barr and Ross Perot, as well as playing the "Lemonade Scammer."
It's time to officially start panicking that you haven't done any Christmas shopping yet. Sure you have something in mind for mom and dad. But what about for your internet-obsessed brother or your boyfriend who spends more time on Reddit than he does at work? Where are the 2012 Black Friday deals for them?
Here are seven gifts you can give to any lover of memes, internet culture, or just being as completely ironic as possible at all times. Good luck. And good hunting. For gifts. (Click the links below to purchase.)
If you were finally starting to get your anxiety problem under wraps, this video will certainly spoil that for you. It's an adorable song listing dozens of freak accidents that could kill you. Turns out it's a PSA for Australian rail service Metro
This makes a lot of sense -- it's a sculpture of Honey Boo Boo, made out of 25 pounds of garbage. We see some I Can't Believe It's Not Butter, and a box of spaghetti. Looks like maybe some Snuggie packaging is in there too. Here's an idea for a fun game -- find out how many pieces of Honey Boo Boo garbage you have in your kitchen cabinet right now, and then feel bad accordingly. Thanks, art!
Sure, the food at Thanksgiving is great. But in our opinion, the real star of this holiday is the terrifying artwork brought home from elementary school art class.
You might take the democratic process very seriously, but not everybody is on your side. Specifically the 6,000 or so people who wrote in a cat for US Senator of Virginia. The cat came in third place.
Who's really being punished here? Valerie Rodgers, or the cops she's cooking for? It depends on good she is in the kitchen, we guess. Rodgers was sentenced to cooking Thanksgiving dinner for three cops and a year of probation for reckless driving that resulted in felony charges.
Yesterday was the day for voting for in our Grumpy Cat Look-Alike Poll. Today is the day for voting for actual elected officials. (And in our Grumpy Cat Look-Look-Alike Poll, because it takes like a second. Seriously.) Here are the best memes about voting we could find, and we even tried to keep in nonpartisan, which was pretty hard, because have you noticed how people on the internet have strong opinions? Enjoy!
So this video might not make you cry, but the story probably will. Michael Ferns, a senior at St. Clairsville High in Clairsville, OH, gave up a touchdown one yard from the end zone so that his teammate, Logan Thompson, whose father died two days before, could score instead.
If you don't want to mishear these songs for the rest of your life, you maybe shouldn't watch this video. It's all the best misheard lyrics, compiled into one NSFW video, a video that will destroy listening to the radio for the rest of your life. Why would you w