Best Outdoor Activities Around Flint – Chris’ Top Five
So it’s summer time and it’s time to get outside and have some fun. Now if you are a family man or someone that is so p---- whipped that you can’t make your own plans or decisions, no need to continue reading. However, if you are an alcoholic a-hole like me that likes to get out and meet women, this is the article for you.
If you like to drink and compete with your friends this is definitely the game for you. It is extremely easy and cheap to set-up and definitely a great team drinking game. You will need 2 PVC pipes that are 4 foot in length, a Frisbee, 2 beer bottles, a partner that won’t crack under the influence and a crap ton of beer to drink. You stick each pipe into the ground about 30 ft from each other. Next, place a beer bottle on top of the pipe. The object of the game is to knock the bottle off the opposing team’s pipe by throwing the Frisbee at it. Points are simple. The opposing team can keep you from earning points by catching the Frisbee and the beer bottle before they hit the ground. However, if you successfully knock the beer bottle to the ground and the other team fails to catch the Frisbee…3 points (2 for the bottle and 1 for the Frisbee). Here's the awesome catch; the players must have a beer in one hand the entire game! It’s a race to 21! Ready, Set, GO!
To thoroughly enjoy the summertime…there is nothing like a good game of volleyball. Not your everyday, family reunion style game. I’m talking join a league at the bar and getting sweaty with scantly clad hotties with easy access to the bar. Co-ed teams are definitely the way to go. The key is, do not get too competitive. Everyone wants to win but don’t let that ruin you chance of a post game shower with the ladies. Let’s be honest, sand gets everywhere…be a gentleman and help her get those hard to reach places. Two of my favorite places to get a good game of volleyball are as follows. Maddens Lounge in Davison. There are plenty of nice courts to check out the action. The more games going on means more women around. Chances are, you will know someone playing there…so stop by and say hi and you’re in. The other place, my home away from home, is Sharky’s Sport Bar. Nice courts, awesome patio and a lot of good looking women. Now kids, if there is one thing I’ve learned as a one time Sharky’s Customer of the Week, it’s that the best wingman is a Sharky’s server. Trust me on this one. Just tell them Chris Monroe sent you.
Golf is a gold mine of summer enjoyment. Even if you are like me and suck at the game, it is still worth while! It’s quiet, there is no shortage of beer, your baby mama isn’t yelling at you and the best thing of all, cart girls. Unfortunately, my ability to drink 18 beers in 9 holes has kept me from crossing “take cart girl home” off my bucket list. On the other hand, the summer is still young and I have plenty of time to find the right cheesy pick line to achieve that goal. Check out a couple of my favorite courses below.
To get the most out of ice cream parlor season you will need a puppy (the smaller and yappier the better) or a small child (son/daughter, niece/nephew, whatever is available.) For the socially inept, we call these chick magnets. There are only 4 types of people that go to ice cream parlors:
- Teenagers (try not to stab them)
- Grandparents enjoying time with the grandchildren or having a nice desert after dinner at 4:30. (ignore them)
- MILF’s. Here is where the puppy/child comes in…its shows your softer side so strike up a conversation. You have to act fast because you only have the amount of time it takes for their little brat to consume their superman cone with sprinkles to seal the deal!
- Other guys with a puppy or kid. They are pulling from your playbook, so beat them to the punch and start a convo with the milf before you even place your order!
It’s a simple plan, just bring your “A Game.” Here are a few places you can try this out:
Summertime is about being outdoors and enjoying nature. Boating, going to the beach, swimming are always great to enjoy. If you haven’t noticed by now, all of my top 5 outdoor activities include women, beer or both, surprised? The beach and swimming pools are hit and miss. With that said, boating is where it’s at. Some of you I’m sure are thinking “I don’t have a boat, what can I do?” The answer is simple, you take the Chris Monroe way out. You make a deal with a friend to have a permanent invite on their boat. Although I can not reveal all of the secrets of such a deal, I can tell you this. Offer to fill up the tank at least once a week, he or she will not be able to resist free gas for their boat. Next step, recruit some girls for a day on the lake. Chicks dig boats so this should be easy. Finally, acquire the proper amount of alcohol. Hope that Mother Nature cooperates and kick back and let the tan lines, bad decisions and possible nakedness begin. You’re welcome!