Michigan Man Whips Out a Knife Over Sandwich Prices

A Michigan man went on a violent tirade - over the weekend - threatening to slice up an employee of a sandwich shop with a pocket knife because he felt the price of the foot long feast was a bunch of bologna.

According to a news release issued by Dearborn Police Chief Ronald Haddad, 26-year-old Zachary Teeters walked into a nearby sandwich shop, reportedly hungrier than a pack of wild animals, and ordered the daily special. However, when the clerk gave him his total, Teeters flipped out, whipped out a knife, and began waving it around; screaming something about being railroaded by deli meats and cut-rate cheeses.

In the midst of all the madness, another store employee contacted authorities and soon Teeters was sitting behind bars with one count of felonious assault hanging over his head like a bad dog with incontinence issues.

“These types of crimes are totally intolerable and will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law,” said Haddad.

Honestly, we’re happy that this guy is so passionate about sandwiches because where he is going, he is going to be served plenty of salami in between his buns.