Michigan Woman Rips Off Walmart, Makes Getaway on Rascal

A Michigan woman is in trouble with the law after police say she stole items from a local Walmart and then used one of the store’s motorized scooters to make her getaway.

According to reports, 46-year-old Shirley Mason made off with a basket full of white trash loot that she stole from the neighborhood Walmart, and made it nearly two miles down the road before law enforcement managed to catch up with her.

Police busted with several plastic grocery bags full of clothing, for which she had no receipt.

When police asked Mason why she stole the motorized cart to make her escape, she told them she “didn’t feel like walking” and could not find anyone willing to give her a ride. Of course, this is an unusual thought process consider the age old motto between thieves has always been “Be prepared to haul ass.”