Women Who Read ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ Are Freaks Says University of Michigan

Alright fellas – if you are into hooking up with women that are destined to fill your lives full of drama and make your world a living hell, then be sure they have read “Fifty Shades of Grey.” A new study by the University of Michigan finds that young adult women who have read the book are more likely to be emotionally unstable than those who have not.

Interestingly, the latest research finds that women who have made it a point to read the entire three-part Fifty Shades series are more likely to be drunken and promiscuous than women who have no interest in the book.

This study can be found in the latest Journal of Women’s Health, which insists that adult females who are attracted to “Fifty Shades of Grey” are more likely to put up with men who abuse them. The belief is that this behavior is influenced by the book similar to how past studies have found that violent television shows lead to people opening themselves up to real-life violent and antisocial situations.

“We recognize that the depiction of violence against women in and of itself is not problematic, especially if the depiction attempts to shed serious light on the problem,” said Amy Bonomi, with MSU’s Department of Human Development and Family Studies. “The problem comes when the depiction reinforces the acceptance of the status quo, rather than challenging it.”

Considering this theory, we highly advise turning your girlfriends and wives on to as much pornographic material as possible.