masturbating

The internet porn hotspot Pornhub is well-known for giving "wood." In celebration of Arbor Day (which already happened on April 25th), they want to give you wood... literally.

If while trying to fire one off,  my mom walked in and said "It feels good, doesn't it?" I would throw up for sure. The 70's were a really weird time to try to explain to your kid how to masturbate, but then again, it would be weird anytime.

While live at the Machine Shop, the Free Beer & Hot Wings show talked about this ex-Santa Fe officer Sergeant Mike Eiskant masturbating in his squad car. Hot Wings had the best pun ever. Check it out below.

I'm pretty sure robots are going to take over the planet.  Them or zombies.  Or maybe aliens.  Or maybe Zombie Alien Robots.  Regardless, robots now have hands, meaning it's only a matter of time until someone uses it to masturbate.

This is just wrong, but way too funny not to share. Normally you masturbate in the bathroom, but not this dog, he does it in his room. Don't watch if you don't want to laugh!