Masturbation

WTF?!

There's distracted driving, and then there's this guy, who allegedly lost his life as a result of masturbating to porn on his phone while driving in Detroit last weekend.

PornHub has created a wristband that will save the energy you create while jerking off and let you charge your phones, tablets and other devices with it. Talk about a stroke of genius!

Talk about a not so special delivery! Paul Bennett, 45, of England recently pleaded guilty to indecent exposure and threatening with abusive behavior. This was the result of him attempting to put his package inside of a mailbox. When I say package, I mean his penis.

For centuries, men have been forced to hide their "self-congratulation" rituals in dark corners and behind closed doors. Now men can furiously masturbate in plain site with all the discretion of a hidden ninja assassin thanks to the Portable Masturbatorium.

Wheaties will keep you from beating your meaty. While not exactly true, Michigan physician Dr. John Harvey Kellogg did develop the famous breakfast cereal “Corn Flakes” while attempting to develop a diet that would prevent his patients from masturbating.

I am all for dropping prices, but dropping your pants in a Walmart bathroom and masturbating is a whole new kind of low! An Oklahoma man is accused of just that. If the woman that caught him has her way, there will be no happy ending for this clown.

If people having been coming to Jersey Joe's Pizzeria for years, this photo may stop them from coming now. Allegedly the man in this photo masturbating is the restaurant owner, Joe. Yep, right in the kitchen!

William Blakely definitely had his hands full as he drove around town. This former Vice-Mayor of Tennessee is accused of driving recklessly while masturbating down an interstate.

Gretchen Molannen, 39-year old Florida resident, spent nearly 16 years suffering from a rare sexual disorder that eventually caused her to take her own life.

There's nothing sexier than a woman who reads. Unless of course she is reading and being pleasured at the same time. Check out this sexy nerd with her vibrator going as she reads from the literary classic 'American Psycho.'

Japan, you've done it again.  Check out this video, featuring what seems to be some sort of egg-toy.  Then check out how it quickly it become obvious what the toys real purpose is.