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Michigan Coaching Candidates

Well, it’ s official.  One day after U of M denied reports of firing their head coach, it was announced today, Richard Rodriguez is no longer a Wolverine.  And for all of the hype in the past 2 weeks, the dream replacement, MI alum Jim Harbaugh, doesn’t appear to be en route to Ann Arbor.  Who should the next head coach be?  Find out inside!

It sucks Jim Harbaugh isn’t coming.  But he’s not.  Get that thought out of your minds.  Regardless of the fact he is a Michigan man, there are just too many other jobs available.  I do understand why the University is making such a big deal in recruiting a Michigan man.  I’ve considered some of my favorite Michigan Men and put together a list.

  • Kid Rock-Really, is there a bigger Michigan celebrity?  Having Coach Rock would really help the recruiting process, because college football stars love drinking, getting arrested, tattoos,  blonds with fake boobs, and jewelry.  These men would be ready for the NFL under Coach Rock
Coach Rock
Photo by Frank Micelotta/ImageDirect
  • Barry Sanders-Honestly, where the hell has he been?  I know his son plays college ball, but he’s been under the radar for years.  Hopefully, he’s been watching film.  This could be Sanders chance to finally win a championship for the state of Michigan.  Also, how awesome was he?

  • Tim “The Toolman” Taylor-I know this seems like a stretch, but this fictional character has all the makings of a great coach.  First of all, he is a leader of men.  Al, his boys, the Tool Time Audience, the guys from K&B construction, all men that follow the Toolman.  Plus, the University could cut out a few maintenance positions.  Also, Tim would bring in a coaching staff of Al, Benny from the hardware store, Wilson, and Al’s mother to coach the linemen.

Team Toolman

  • Jerry Bruckheimer-Another unlikely candidate, and you might question his qualifications.  But the dude made “Remember The Titans” proving he can bring a football team together.  Maybe Denzel with be a coordinator or something.
The future of Ann Arbor?
Photo By Getty Images
  • Verne Troyer-Ok maybe he wouldn’t be very good at the job, but how funny would it be to have him out there in a little headset and tiny little blue and maize clothes?
Coach Mini Me
Photo by Getty Images

All Michigan men, and all qualified for the job.  I don’t want to break a story before it happens, but don’t be suprised when you see one of these men, standing on the sidelines in a sea of Blue and Maize.

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