A Tennessee man was arrested at a bar this past Friday after he attempted to have sex with an ATM and a picnic table.

Lonnie Hutton walked into a bar, pulled down his pants in front of an ATM machine and tried to have sex with it. Ewwww! Hey, I have been screwed in the past by an ATM machine (I wanted money, not stamps), it's about time someone tried to screw back! Maybe the machine would have been more forthcoming if Lonnie put money in it before he tried sticking his penis in?

Of course, police were called. When they arrived they took Lonnie outside and sat him on a picnic table. Well, apparently this creeper thinks picnic tables are hot too, because he also attempted to have sex with it. As, you probably guessed, Hutton reeked of alcohol. He was arrested for public intoxication.

I just have one question. Is he seeing anyone?


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