Folks in West Virginia catch all kinds of crap for supposedly not being the sharpest tools in the shed. But after reading this story I'd say they've rightfully earned that distinction, as one West Virginia man went into a pet store and decided to steal a two-foot baby alligator by shoving it up his shirt. I can only guess he did this for one of two reasons. Either he has some kind of weird nipple-biting fetish or he's a complete moron. (my money is on the latter) The employees checked the surveillance footage and recognized him as a regular customer, so the police should be able to track him down quickly. Checkout the surveillance video from the local news report below.

[Source: WVNS TV-59]